Family

Well, I "outed" myself at church this morning. I gave the minister the ok to announce my illness. Although many church members already knew, I wasn't ready to make a big announcement until now. I wanted to make sure my kids were ok first, and also to have some idea what the game plan was going to be. I got a lot of support after the services, some who had been through breast cancer or had a close relative with the disease themselves. One church friend appears to have had DCIS 2 times. She had a lumpectomy and radiation twice (once each side - 8 years apart). The second time, the surgeon was really pushing for mastectomy, but she thankfully got a second opinion and was able to save her breast! It seems like mastectomy is probably more common that it needs to be, given that the survival statistics for lumpectomy/radiation is equal to that of mastectomy in many cancers. But some women feel better being more aggressive. I think I would be more cautious, and given my propensity to research everything, would make sure that mastectomy was the very best option before choosing such a radical treatment.

My sister-in-law discovered a lump in her breast on Friday. Needless to say, she was pretty freaked out. She went to the doctor right away, and they think it's a cyst, but she's having a mammogram and ultrasound this Wednesday to be sure. That's 5 days of waiting! I totally feel her pain. I even brought my Breast Book to Easter today in case she wanted to read about cysts! She politely declined. I also offered to ultrasound her at the vet clinic. Also declined. Just trying to help!

My parents having been reading this blog, and my dad said something interesting to me today. I thought I inherited my insomnia from my mom, but I guess I get it from both sides of the family. He said he totally understood my difficulty sleeping these days, as he had the same problem after failing a cardiac stress test 20 years ago. There was a month between the first test and the angioplasty, and it was very difficult month for him. He dreaded nightfall because it meant another long night of anxiety about his health, and also about his inability to sleep. My dad doesn't say much, so this was a lot. Interesting perspective. I didn't think my insomnia was totally related to cancer, because I'm not really thinking about it too much at night. Or maybe I'm lying to myself. I'm sort of mad because several of my 40 year goals have flown out the window. I'm back on nightly Benadryl. After being within 2 pounds of my ideal weight, now I'm gaining. And I probably won't have time for my goal of becoming a certified personal trainer any time soon. Oh, well. I suppose this disease is trying to teach me to slow down and put less pressure on myself. Whatever. Like cancer is totally going to change my personality. Well, it can try.

BTW, I bought an even better pair of Keen sandals to replace the pair I lost in Hawaii. In case you were wondering.